From Father Steven - January 28, 2024

Father Steven Clemence • January 26, 2024

 

Dear Brothers and Sisters,

 

For a long time, I have wanted to share with you some thoughts about grief and dealing with the passing of our loved ones. I would like to reflect this week over this difficult subject from a Christian, hope-filled, realistic perspective.

 

None of us like losing anything. We all feel sad for losing ten dollars, a key-chain, and some other small objects. We feel even worse by losing something that has some emotional value to us, whether a special rosary, a gift from someone special, or anything that is irreplaceable. We feel sad and it’s ok to feel sad, because we lost something valuable. Depending on the person, they can deal with their emotions in a controlled or an uncontrolled way…and sometimes it’s not even up to us to control it. Now imagine how much harder it would be to lose someone, instead of something, whether this person was close to us, as a special friend, relative, parent, sibling, or a child. In one way our Christian faith tells us that we should be happy for them, because their suffering has ended, we hope they are in heaven with God. Having that in mind, we can feel guilty for feeling sad or can think that it is wrong. Emotions are not right or wrong, because they come from the heart. Fr. Mike Schmitz in one of his videos, uses the comparison of the sense of smell with our emotions. We cannot control the sense of smell on the streets, whether it’s pleasant or unpleasant. It is not a matter of good or bad, they are just there. At times they can also indicate something about reality. If you smell fresh coffee it may be an indicator to wake up, or if you smell food, you know it’s time for supper. At the moment of death, our hearts can reveal things of a deeper reality that we were not aware of. Maybe we can come to the realization that we loved that person even more than we imagined. It can reveal wounds from past losses or grudges we held for that person that we were not able to deal with and we feel sad for that. It is ok to feel sad, it is ok to grieve.

 

We don’t have Christian emotions. We have human emotions. In the Scriptures we can see how different characters loved, rejoiced, wept, grieved. Depending on the situation, they were happy or sad. It is a natural reaction. Having said this, once we experience those reactions, we can also have supernatural reactions, those are God-given feelings. St. Paul exhorts us to grieve, but not like those who don’t have hope (1 Thessalonians 4:13-14). Because Jesus conquered death, it no longer has the last word. Everyone who dies in Christ will rise again. Then hope appears! A God-given virtue that helps us to look at our loss differently. Surely the death of our loved one hurts, but it is not the end. Like a bad smell that is unpleasant, as long as we keep breathing, it will go away. The memories remain though…and those can be tricky. We certainly miss having our loved ones around, their stories, laughs, smiles etc. However, they are signs from God to us to be grateful for having such a great person around us. We don’t care about losing a penny, because it is insignificant to us. That will not change our lives. However, the people we lose, they can be significant. They did change our lives. They gave our hearts an opportunity to love, and love is eternal. Then, we will also love that person, whether they have passed or have moved on from our lives. It is ok to miss that person, as we may miss our childhood friends, but God wants us to have hope of seeing them again, either in the mall or in heaven. And love is always stronger than grief.

 

Therefore, as we battle our emotions, let our reason and our faith assist in this struggle. Reason will tell us that it was good to have had that person in our lives, and we are grateful for it. Faith invites us to believe that their lives are not over, but “changed” as we pray in the funeral mass. Faith will also tell us that we shall see them again, when we also rise at the resurrection of the dead. Let us, then, make sure that we also go to heaven, lest our loved ones make it and we don’t. Finally, don’t be ashamed of your tears, because they are signs of great love. It’s ok to cry, but with the hope that we will be reunited!

 

God Bless,

Fr. Steven

 

By Father Steven Clemence July 18, 2025
Dear Brothers and Sisters, I hope you are having a wonderful summer—visiting family and friends, enjoying beautiful places, and, above all, continuing your prayerful life with the Lord. It can be challenging at times to maintain our spiritual routine while on vacation. St. John Bosco exhorted young people to make time for recreation , not relaxation —there is a difference between having moments of fun and letting our guard down. Remember, the devil never rests; he is like a lion looking for someone to devour. A balanced life is always best: a little bit of work, a little bit of fun, and a little bit of prayer. Indeed, we should take advantage of the summer to do things we often don’t have time for during the rest of the year. On a separate note, in case you were not here last weekend, I announced that our Archbishop, Richard Henning, has extended my term as pastor for another six years. He is very pleased with what he hears about the parish, which is a reflection of your efforts and your prayers. I must confess that I, too, am very pleased to see the work that God is accomplishing in our community. There are many graces that God has bestowed on our people—many stories of individuals returning to the Church, receiving the sacraments after many years, and much more. One of the greatest privileges I have is witnessing God at work in people’s lives. Of course, we also share in the sorrows and struggles of our parishioners. But after these years, I can say that, counting both the joyful and the difficult moments, I am very happy to be your pastor. My primary duties are to teach, sanctify, and govern the parish. I have done my best to fulfill these responsibilities. I know I don’t have much to offer, so I kindly ask for your patience with my limitations. I too walk alongside you on this path of growing closer to the Lord. Mistakes have been made in the past, and there may be more in the future—hopefully fewer. Please continue to pray for me and for all priests. We truly need all the prayers we can get. Next week, I will accompany a group of 51 young people on a pilgrimage to Rome for the Jubilee of Youth. Fr. Gabriel will also be going, although with a different group. Fr. Victor will remain here with you, along with Fr. Cássio Dalpiaz, a longtime friend of mine from Brazil. He is a priest from Brasília and will soon be going to Portugal to complete his doctoral studies on the connection between Literature and Theology (he has done extensive work on the theology behind Tolkien’s writings). He speaks English, Portuguese, Spanish, and French. Some of the youth going to Rome are children of immigrants who faced difficult times not long ago. Thank God their situation has improved, though some families are still dealing with immigration-related issues. These young people are struggling to cover the full cost of the trip, so they will be asking for donations after Mass. Lastly, I’ve invited some parishioners to share their testimonies in the upcoming bulletins. I hope these stories help convey some of the beautiful things happening in our parish and in the lives of our people. Let us continue to pray that more souls may choose the “better part”—that is, to love and serve the Lord. God Bless, Fr. Steven
By Father Steven Clemence July 11, 2025
Dear Brothers and Sisters, This weekend we will hear the story of the Good Samaritan. We all know the story—but do we act as the Good Samaritan? There are some stories in the Bible that we are so familiar with that we could almost recite them backwards. The danger of becoming too familiar with a story is that it no longer impacts us. We can become numb to the message of Jesus. I would like to offer three thoughts to help us meditate on this Gospel passage. First , the geography is very important. The story takes place on the road from Jerusalem to Jericho. Therefore, all the characters had just been in the presence of God in the Temple in the Holy City. To bring this into our daily context, it would be as if people had just left Mass. After praying to the Lord, they encounter a victim. Can you imagine—after listening to the commandment of love, they are given the opportunity to put it into practice, but they bypass it? Second , the characters in the story are not horrible people. According to Jewish precepts, if someone touched a corpse, they would become ritually impure. Perhaps they didn’t want to defile themselves. Maybe they didn’t have time to return to Jerusalem to go through the rite of purification. Or perhaps they thought the victim was already dead, or they were simply in a rush. In other words, there could have been a “reasonable” or “justifiable” excuse not to help the needy person. Third , the Samaritans were not on good terms with the Jews. Due to a historical event long ago when the Israelites were taken into exile, their rivalry had deep roots. It would be like the Red Sox and the Yankees, or Catholics and Protestants in Northern Ireland—they really didn’t like each other. That is why the Samaritan is called “good.” Since Samaritans were generally viewed negatively, this one stood out as “good.” However, this hostility did not stop our Samaritan friend from helping his neighbor. Though they all believed in the same God, not all acted like God. Jesus tells us that all the Law is summed up in love of God and neighbor. We can all know what is right and wrong, like the characters in the Bible. The real question is: do we excuse ourselves like the priest and the Levite, or do we act like the Samaritan? As we approach the Lord at Mass this weekend, let us not be mere consumers. Quite the opposite—let us be re-energized and do what the Lord has done for us. As we witness Christ giving His life for us in His Body and Blood, let us do the same. “Love one another as I have loved you” (Jn 13:34). This command “is something very near to you, already in your mouths and in your hearts; you have only to carry it out,” as we hear in the first reading. Finally, I would like to highlight a couple of things. This Sunday, 7/13 , some parishioners will be holding a fundraiser for a group of 50 pilgrims who will attend the Youth Jubilee in Rome this summer. They will host a ticketed Spanish Rock Concert at 3 p.m., either in Meehan Hall or in the parking lot (donations can also be sent to the parish office). We are also promoting the Catholic Fest event next weekend. There will be food and games in the parking lot. We’ll also have Sean Forrest, a singer and missionary, sharing his amazing witness from 2–3:30 p.m. (in the church). I hope you can stop by on Saturday, July 19th , from 11 a.m. to 6 p.m.  Let us not miss these opportunities to support our parish—and to love one another! God Bless, Fr. Steven
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