From Father Steven - January 28, 2024

Father Steven Clemence • January 26, 2024

 

Dear Brothers and Sisters,

 

For a long time, I have wanted to share with you some thoughts about grief and dealing with the passing of our loved ones. I would like to reflect this week over this difficult subject from a Christian, hope-filled, realistic perspective.

 

None of us like losing anything. We all feel sad for losing ten dollars, a key-chain, and some other small objects. We feel even worse by losing something that has some emotional value to us, whether a special rosary, a gift from someone special, or anything that is irreplaceable. We feel sad and it’s ok to feel sad, because we lost something valuable. Depending on the person, they can deal with their emotions in a controlled or an uncontrolled way…and sometimes it’s not even up to us to control it. Now imagine how much harder it would be to lose someone, instead of something, whether this person was close to us, as a special friend, relative, parent, sibling, or a child. In one way our Christian faith tells us that we should be happy for them, because their suffering has ended, we hope they are in heaven with God. Having that in mind, we can feel guilty for feeling sad or can think that it is wrong. Emotions are not right or wrong, because they come from the heart. Fr. Mike Schmitz in one of his videos, uses the comparison of the sense of smell with our emotions. We cannot control the sense of smell on the streets, whether it’s pleasant or unpleasant. It is not a matter of good or bad, they are just there. At times they can also indicate something about reality. If you smell fresh coffee it may be an indicator to wake up, or if you smell food, you know it’s time for supper. At the moment of death, our hearts can reveal things of a deeper reality that we were not aware of. Maybe we can come to the realization that we loved that person even more than we imagined. It can reveal wounds from past losses or grudges we held for that person that we were not able to deal with and we feel sad for that. It is ok to feel sad, it is ok to grieve.

 

We don’t have Christian emotions. We have human emotions. In the Scriptures we can see how different characters loved, rejoiced, wept, grieved. Depending on the situation, they were happy or sad. It is a natural reaction. Having said this, once we experience those reactions, we can also have supernatural reactions, those are God-given feelings. St. Paul exhorts us to grieve, but not like those who don’t have hope (1 Thessalonians 4:13-14). Because Jesus conquered death, it no longer has the last word. Everyone who dies in Christ will rise again. Then hope appears! A God-given virtue that helps us to look at our loss differently. Surely the death of our loved one hurts, but it is not the end. Like a bad smell that is unpleasant, as long as we keep breathing, it will go away. The memories remain though…and those can be tricky. We certainly miss having our loved ones around, their stories, laughs, smiles etc. However, they are signs from God to us to be grateful for having such a great person around us. We don’t care about losing a penny, because it is insignificant to us. That will not change our lives. However, the people we lose, they can be significant. They did change our lives. They gave our hearts an opportunity to love, and love is eternal. Then, we will also love that person, whether they have passed or have moved on from our lives. It is ok to miss that person, as we may miss our childhood friends, but God wants us to have hope of seeing them again, either in the mall or in heaven. And love is always stronger than grief.

 

Therefore, as we battle our emotions, let our reason and our faith assist in this struggle. Reason will tell us that it was good to have had that person in our lives, and we are grateful for it. Faith invites us to believe that their lives are not over, but “changed” as we pray in the funeral mass. Faith will also tell us that we shall see them again, when we also rise at the resurrection of the dead. Let us, then, make sure that we also go to heaven, lest our loved ones make it and we don’t. Finally, don’t be ashamed of your tears, because they are signs of great love. It’s ok to cry, but with the hope that we will be reunited!

 

God Bless,

Fr. Steven

 

From Father Steven - July 19, 2026

By Father Steven Clemence • July 17, 2026
Dear Brothers and Sisters, As you may remember, Fr. Gabriel and I were away on a retreat in Italy these past few weeks. I would like to share a bit of my experience with you. Hopefully, in the near future, he will be able to share his experience as well. You may know that the three of us priests were formed in a missionary-diocesan seminary called Redemptoris Mater , which is a seminary that was first created by Pope Saint John Paul II in Rome. His desire was to have priests who belonged to the diocese and, at the same time, were missionaries (either outside the diocese or within it) to assist in the new evangelization born after the Second Vatican Council. Also, the vocations to this seminary come from the Neocatechumenal Way, which is an itinerary of Christian formation that is present all over the world. This way, those who feel called by God to this specific mission can also continue the growth of their faith in this reality. From Rome, other bishops also desired to have such priests in their own dioceses. In 2005, Cardinal Seán requested that this seminary begin here in Boston, and that's how we all ended up here. Well, this retreat we attended was for all the priests ordained in the approximately 40 Redemptoris Mater seminaries present throughout the Americas (North, Central/Caribbean, and South). We were about 800 priests who were able to be there. It took place in Porto San Giorgio, which is on the Adriatic Sea. The initiators of the Neocatechumenal Way were there to give us a word of encouragement, to help us convert, and to rest. We were given a special place in St. Peter's Square for the Pope's Audience, and later we celebrated Mass inside the Basilica, at the Chair of St. Peter. We also went twice to Loreto, which houses the walls of the house of Mary in Nazareth. We also had the opportunity to be sent throughout all of Italy to announce the Kingdom of God two by two for four days, like the Apostles, without money, a cellphone, extra clothes, or a place to sleep... no securities, except God. We only took the Bible and the breviary. I was assigned to the city of Trent, where the famous council took place 500 years ago. After the retreat, I was able to visit the house of St. Maria Goretti, her tomb, and the place where she died. On my way back, I had a 24-hour layover in Barcelona, where I got to visit the Basilica of the Holy Family and the Shrine of Montserrat. What impacted me the most was being reminded of what God has done in my life. There were a few old friends from my childhood and people whom I have met along the way (Fr. Adriano sent his greetings to everyone). At every step of the way, He was there leading me, comforting me, and lifting me up when I fell. It was good also to rest in the Lord. No, I did not watch the World Cup games, but I had something much better: a time of intimacy with God. Running around all day, every day sometimes takes the focus away from my mission. Like Martha, we can tend to important things and leave the Lord behind. If anything, it is by being close to Christ that I will be enabled to help some people. Lastly, we were also presented with a beautiful symphony performance. In it, they sang the words of St. Victorinus of Pettau, who is an impressive saint from the early Church: "Having come as the Lion to conquer, He became the Lamb, taking upon Himself the wickedness of man, so that He might lead him from death to life."  The mission of the priest is to be Christ to the people. As we heard last week, Jesus is meek and humble of heart. The only answer to the suffering of people is to become a lamb and die for them out of love, just like Christ. The Lion came to conquer and was made the Lamb to die because He loves me. In the retreat, I see that God gives me His Spirit to (hopefully) be a lamb who dies for others. Please keep praying for me and be patient, as I still have a long way to go! God Bless, Fr. Steven

From Father Steven - July 12, 2026

By Father Steven Clemence • July 10, 2026
Dear Brothers and Sisters, This week I would like to bring to your attention a very important matter. Recently, electronic cigarettes were developed, and they have become widely popular among teenagers today. Also known as vaping, they can have all sorts of shapes and colors, but they are nonetheless nicotine-based cigarettes that are immensely harmful to consumers. Here in town, there is a petition to ban the sale of nicotine products to the younger generation (the ban would be for anyone born after Jan. 1, 2010). Vaping is like smoking cigarettes; however, vapes are odorless, widely accessible, and very discreet. The electronic device can be as small as a USB drive. You may have seen people with a pen-like device that produces a white smoke, at times with a sweet smell. Many of the flavors come in fruit and candy flavors that appeal to youth. E-cigarettes produce an aerosol, which users inhale from the device and exhale. The aerosol can contain harmful and potentially harmful substances, including: nicotine; ultrafine particles that can be inhaled deep into the lungs; flavoring such as diacetyl, a chemical linked to a serious lung disease; volatile organic compounds; cancer-causing chemicals; and heavy metals such as nickel, tin, and lead. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, e-cigarettes are not safe for youth, young adults, pregnant women, or adults who do not currently use tobacco products. E-cigarettes have not been approved by the FDA as a smoking cessation device, and additional research is needed to help understand the long-term health effects of e-cigarette use. Furthermore, e-cigarettes contain nicotine. Nicotine is a highly addictive substance. According to the Surgeon General, because the brain isn’t fully developed until the mid-20s, youth and young adults are uniquely at risk for long-term effects of exposing their developing brains to nicotine. These risks include nicotine addiction, mood disorders, and permanently lowered impulse control. Nicotine also changes the way synapses are formed, which can harm the parts of the brain that control attention and learning. Another danger is that other substances may be used with vaping, such as cannabis/marijuana or other CBD or THC products, which could cause a person to become high. The latest reports from the CDC from 2024 show that 43.6% of students (both middle and high school) report current use of vaping. Another study reports that 63.9% of students who currently use e-cigarettes reported wanting to quit or having tried to quit. I have seen firsthand the destructive power of vaping among our youth. Unfortunately, many parents are not aware of their use. They even hide and use them in their schools. They are too young to understand the harm caused by vaping and the future consequences it can have. Nicotine pouches are increasingly more popular among youth. Therefore, in order to help them, we are supporting the Nicotine-Free Generation program that is currently being revised by the Board of Health, and it will be presented to the mayor. The idea behind it is to aid those already using nicotine products. The city will offer robust smoking cessation programs, ensuring adolescents and adults alike have the resources to quit. Additionally, by restricting access to nicotine products, we can deter adolescents from starting to use these harmful substances, significantly reducing the risk of lifelong addiction and potential cancer.  Therefore, at the end of the Masses for the next two weeks, we will be collecting signatures from those who would like to support this petition. God Bless, Fr. Steven